Brittany Withers

Josh and I met in person a few weeks after my eighteenth birthday. It was over B grade Italian food in Boardbeach and the iPhone had just been released and seemed to get more of Josh’s attention than the $210 Sass and Bide top I had bought for the occasion.

I had first connected with Josh through his Facebook fan page, which I messaged after I realised that he had resigned from the radio station that I listened to on my drive to work. I wanted to encourage him, and I wanted him to know that someone noticed he was gone. It was the most innocent email i’ve ever sent, and to be honest, I never really wanted to hear back.

Fast forward five years, after half a decade of pure friends zone, world travel, ex boyfriends and countless postcards- Josh asked me to hang out with him forever. It was Friday 13th January, exactly 6 weeks from the night Josh told me he had been in love with me since that first crappy dinner. He didn’t have a ring, heck, he didn’t even have a plan- but all I was obsessed with him and in my bones it felt right.

It was clear that we couldn’t be more different- He was chaotic and went with the flow, I was/am an organised stress head. We came from different families and backgrounds that were worlds apart- but I knew this was it. I remember looking at him and thinking that he had such a good heart. That he treated the homeless man the same as he treated the CEO- he was someone you couldn’t help but want to be around. As he was kneeling down on the beach in Cairns blabbering on about how much I meant to him- all I remember thinking was- “One thing that will never change, he’ll always be this amazing person. I just want to be a part of his life.”

Almost three years on, and I still think the same thing..

There’s a whole ‘nother conversation going on In a parallel universe. Where nothing breaks and nothing hurts.

There’s a waltz playin’ frozen in time Blades of grass on tiny bare feet I look at you and you’re lookin' at me Could you beam me up, Give me a minute, I don’t know what I’d say in it I’d probably just stare, happy just to be there, holding your face Beam me up, Let me be lighter, I’m tired of being a fighter, I think a minute’s enough, Just beam me up. In my head I see your baby blues I hear your voice and I, I break in two and now there’s One of me, with you So when I need you can I send you a sign I’ll burn a candle and turn off the lights I’ll pick a star and watch you shine

Breaking up with negative friends is hard, but ultimately freeing. As I sit on a bench drinking my cold brewed coffee on Elizabeth Street in NYC- I got to thinking about the past few months. I made an effort to keep my heart in neutral and take things as they come- and in doing so, some beautiful souls have come my way- and some have floated away!

This is the awkward flip-side of choosing friends; you have to distance yourself from the people you don’t want in your life. I don’t like to hurt feelings. For years I felt obligated to people who wanted to be my friend, even if they were really negative, needy, and not the kind of person I wanted to be around. You don’t need to be rude, but you also don’t have to exchange numbers with someone you didn’t hit it off with, or set up a second hang. If it’s not beautiful, get it out of your life!

If my legs were longer They might carry us further But we waited too long And so the task just gets harder And the thoughts that come in They come on stronger and stronger And it takes all of me To just stay out of the water

1. Diptyque
2. Byredo
3. Camilla  
4. Birkenstock 
5. Love Star

I am so lucky. Not only do I get to be married to an amazing man, I get to talk about it to one of my favourite magazines!White Magazine followed me on my journey of planning our wedding- a paper friend who encouraged me to think outside the box and was always gently whispering ‘you can create a day that is just yours’.  I love White, we advertise with White, we are friends with White and now you get to read a little White feature about my ‘before marriage concerns’…. thats if there are any issues left on the shelves after I buy them all and have them framed for Christmas presents! B x

My soul is from elsewhere, I’m sure of that,and I intend to end up there.

– Ruminant

I am loving my job! I never thought I'd end up selling Beauty promises in a jar... But now I can't imagine doing anything else!

It has been a year: We made it. It has been a good year for Team Withers. Some days we have skipped together, run, or walked; others have felt like an army crawl through mud and in the dark. Some days have been hard, but they have always been good. Here is a little of what I’ve learnt;One year ago, I wrote a blog- wedding cake for breakfast- it was a raw look at what my first two weeks of marriage looked like. I had always heard people harp on that year one of marriage was the hardest, but never understood, until I was knee deep.I see now, after 365 days, that what they meant is that year one is an ADJUSTMENT.

It’s someone sharing your closet, getting water all over the bathroom floor, and someone sitting on the toilet for 25 minutes when you’ve just woken up and need to pee. It’s the compromise between unhealthy snacks and ‘chick food’. It’s the disagreement over salad for dinner, whether Naturopaths are legit, and if the current government is going to destroy the country.  It’s the moments when you choose not to yell when they have forgotten the one thing you asked for, the time to choose love over your ego.

Living with someone who loves you wholeheartedly is the best, and its unbelievably liberating.A single friend of mine always comments that she is far too independent to be married and I giggle inside because, I have found, that a right relationship will spur the creativity within you and push you further than where you could have gone alone. I love my hubby, I love our home, our kitty, our business, and our plans for our future. I love our baby names and our travel plans.  I love that I speed home just to talk to him and he always drops whatever he is doing to fulfil that need.My marriage has gone from the sugary high of wedding cake for breakfast, to the wholesome nutrients of cereal for dinner, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Almost a year ago we danced to this song. And my husband has been living up to the lyrics ever since.

We’ve been together for a while now we’re growing stronger everyday now It feels so good and there is no doubt I will stay with you As each morning brings sunrise and the flowers bloom in springtime On my lovin' you can rely and I’ll stay with you Oh I’ll stay with you through the ups and the downs Oh I’ll stay with you when no one else is around When the dark clouds arrive I will stay by your side I know we’ll be alright I will stay with you Though relationships can get old have a tendency to grow cold We have something like miracle yeah, and I’ll stay with you Oh I’ll stay with you through the ups and the downs Yes I’ll stay with you when no one else is around When the dark clouds arrive I will stay by your side I know we’ll be alright I will stay with you

This was definitely my hardest ‘top 5’ list so far. I mean, how could I choose just 5 romantic films when I love about 100? Well, somehow I managed to (though it took a while). Also, you may be surprised to see that I ended up leaving out classics like Pretty Woman, Casablanca, Titanic, When Harry Met Sally, and Love Actually. Not to say that I don’t love all those films, but for this list, I decided to rather go with films that I was more inclined to watch right now.

1. The Holiday. Two women swap homes for a holiday and both end up finding love. Such a very sweet film and the cast is perfect (if you have not seen it, go watch it).

2. Romeo + Juliet (directed by Baz Luhrmann). There have been quite a few film adaptations of Shakespeare’s book over the years, but this is by far my favourite. Plus, it has a really great soundtrack.

3. The Notebook. It’s damn near impossible to watch this film without getting teary-eyed. It’s ridiculously romantic and beautiful.

4. Before Sunset. This is the sequel to the film Before Sunrise, which is also brilliant. I love the dialogue in both films. If you have not seen this film yet, I would recommend that you watch the first one before this one.

5. Serendipity. A really great romantic comedy that tells the story of two people who meet by chance in New York one night and fate brings them back together years later.

This thing called LOVE - by Jenna McManus–

A few things have happen this past month that have made me look at love in a new light. I don’t know if you could say I have the authority to really be talking about this topic, as I, myself have never actually been in love. But who’s to say I’m not just as qualified as someone who has? I’m working on learning how to love myself day by day, and my life too. But what I’ve started to notice about love of late is from things I have seen and witnessed; words I have heard spoken, and thoughts I have listened too. Which got me thinking about this…

there are too many mediocre things in life, and mediocre love shouldn’t be one of them

It got me thinking about how we as humans tend to settle for things far too ordinary. We accept that what will be will be, too often. We just suck it up and get on with it instead of fighting for something far more extraordinary. Is it because it all seems too hard now? Its out of reach, unattainable?  The “I can’t be bother” mentality washes over our pretty rose colored glasses and the possible opportunity for the fuck you could have gave is now gone. You’ve settled and for some reason you’re ok with it.

I see this far too often. Is it that we just grin and bare it? You couldn’t be f’ed working on the extra 10% that could make your relationship with life and love all the more extraordinary.

The mediocre things in life are the cards that came in the deck of grownup-hood: wake up to a daily routine, the same smell of coffee and those nine to five hours we dread (more like eight to six). We accept it as “life”. All those thoughts you had as a starry-eyed teenager, trying to figure out what exact extraordinary things you wanted to achieve now seem like a distant memory. It wasn’t so long ago you felt this radical change come over you. High school was out and it was as if something much bigger than you was on the horizon; this life full of adventure, new experiences and carving out this dream you so badly wanted to make a reality.

And then it came. The settling into life, and all what may now seem like naivety has washed away

But it doesn’t need to be like this.If we can accept that life will throw some cliched mediocre things our way, we can still fight for the one thing that doesn’t have to be mediocre. LOVE.

Love is the one thing that comes in an abundance of forms. You can love your job, you can love your partner and you most certainly can (and should) love yourself. The energy you put into this lovable life can be that life changing thing you need to cut yourself from the rat race and go on to living an extraordinary life, with an extraordinary relationship with LOVE.

You see, theres no need to settle, not yet.

Because unless its mad, passionate, crazy love, then you my friend better start working on finding that extra 10% to be even more great than you are right now. 

1. Never show up to a dinner/party/thing without something in your hands
2. Leaving clothes wet in the washing machine will make the colours run
3. Always overdress, rather than underdress, for a job interview
4. You catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar
5. Woody Allen makes weird films
6. If you condense all of your shopping purchases into one bag, it softens the blow on your husband
7. If you’ve married a good man, he won’t mind how many shopping bags you come home with
8. Plain flour can’t be substituted with self-raising flour
9. “Don’t marry for money, but don’t be silly enough to fall for someone without any”
10. You can’t make new old friends

What have you learnt from your mama?

People who deal in levels of false expectation often find it difficult to work in a high degree of cooperation. When you enter into an expectation that someone will behave a certain way or a situation will turn out a certain way or you will get a certain result from your action- and that expectation turns out to be false- you often find yourself expressing disappointment  unhappiness, despair or depression... depending on your emotional investment in the outcome. Expectation is a good area to stay away from. When you just let other be and cooperate with what is, you find your life flowing along much more smoothly.

Paris is always a good idea….