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JDW

348_WithersWedding

 

 

Josh and I met in person a few weeks after my eighteenth birthday. It was over B grade Italian food in Boardbeach and the iPhone had just been released and seemed to get more of Josh’s attention than the $210 Sass and Bide top I had bought for the occasion.

I had first connected with Josh through his Facebook fan page, which I messaged after I realised that he had resigned from the radio station that I listened to on my drive to work. I wanted to encourage him, and I wanted him to know that someone noticed he was gone. It was the most innocent email i’ve ever sent, and to be honest, I never really wanted to hear back.

Fast forward five years, after half a decade of pure friends zone, world travel, ex boyfriends and countless postcards- Josh asked me to hang out with him forever. It was Friday 13th January, exactly 6 weeks from the night Josh told me he had been in love with me since that first crappy dinner. He didn’t have a ring, heck, he didn’t even have a plan- but all I was obsessed with him and in my bones it felt right.

It was clear that we couldn’t be more different- He was chaotic and went with the flow, I was/am an organised stress head. We came from different families and backgrounds that were worlds apart- but I knew this was it. I remember looking at him and thinking that he had such a good heart. That he treated the homeless man the same as he treated the CEO- he was someone you couldn’t help but want to be around. As he was kneeling down on the beach in Cairns blabbering on about how much I meant to him- all I remember thinking was- “One thing that will never change, he’ll always be this amazing person. I just want to be a part of his life.”

Almost three years on, and I still think the same thing..

LAD

Lorna

There’s a whole ‘nother conversation going on
In a parallel universe.
Where nothing breaks and nothing hurts.
There’s a waltz playin’ frozen in time
Blades of grass on tiny bare feet
I look at you and you’re lookin’ at me

Could you beam me up,
Give me a minute, I don’t know what I’d say in it
I’d probably just stare, happy just to be there, holding your face
Beam me up,
Let me be lighter, I’m tired of being a fighter,
I think a minute’s enough,
Just beam me up.

In my head I see your baby blues
I hear your voice and I, I break in two and now there’s
One of me, with you

So when I need you can I send you a sign
I’ll burn a candle and turn off the lights
I’ll pick a star and watch you shine

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Breaking up with negative friends is hard, but ultimately freeing. As I sit on a bench drinking my cold brewed coffee on Elizabeth Street in NYC- I got to thinking about the past few months. I made an effort to keep my heart in neutral and take things as they come- and in doing so, some beautiful souls have come my way- and some have floated away!

This is the awkward flip-side of choosing friends; you have to distance yourself from the people you don’t want in your life. I don’t like to hurt feelings. For years I felt obligated to people who wanted to be my friend, even if they were really negative, needy, and not the kind of person I wanted to be around. You don’t need to be rude, but you also don’t have to exchange numbers with someone you didn’t hit it off with, or set up a second hang. If it’s not beautiful, get it out of your life!

If my legs were longer
They might carry us further
But we waited too long
And so the task just gets harder
And the thoughts that come in
They come on stronger and stronger
And it takes all of me
To just stay out of the water

My interview with White Magazine!

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I am so lucky. Not only do I get to be married to an amazing man, I get to talk about it to one of my favourite magazines!

White Magazine followed me on my journey of planning our wedding- a paper friend who encouraged me to think outside the box and was always gently whispering ‘you can create a day that is just yours’.  I love White, we advertise with White, we are friends with White and now you get to read a little White feature about my ‘before marriage concerns’…. thats if there are any issues left on the shelves after I buy them all and have them framed for Christmas presents!

 

B x

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cereal for dinner?

It has been a year: We made it. It has been a good year for Team Withers. Some days we have skipped together, run, or walked; others have felt like an army crawl through mud and in the dark. Some days have been hard, but they have always been good. Here is a little of what I’ve learnt;

One year ago, I wrote a blog- wedding cake for breakfast– it was a raw look at what my first two weeks of marriage looked like. I had always heard people harp on that year one of marriage was the hardest, but never understood, until I was knee deep.

I see now, after 365 days, that what they meant is that year one is an ADJUSTMENT.

It’s someone sharing your closet, getting water all over the bathroom floor, and someone sitting on the toilet for 25 minutes when you’ve just woken up and need to pee. It’s the compromise between unhealthy snacks and ‘chick food’. It’s the disagreement over salad for dinner, whether Naturopaths are legit, and if the current government is going to destroy the country.  It’s the moments when you choose not to yell when they have forgotten the one thing you asked for, the time to choose love over your ego. 

Living with someone who loves you wholeheartedly is the best, and its unbelievably liberating.

A single friend of mine always comments that she is far too independent to be married and I giggle inside because, I have found, that a right relationship will spur the creativity within you and push you further than where you could have gone alone. I love my hubby, I love our home, our kitty, our business, and our plans for our future. I love our baby names and our travel plans.  I love that I speed home just to talk to him and he always drops whatever he is doing to fulfil that need.

My marriage has gone from the sugary high of wedding cake for breakfast, to the wholesome nutrients of cereal for dinner, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.